There have been several things going on around Ethiopia that I have not been able to address because I didn’t know what to make of them. One of the things that people are talking about the most is the rise of Violence Against Women (VAW). Well, I don’t know if the correct term is “rise” as this had been going on for a while now, people just never spoken about it as they do so freely today.
We’ve heard of the many cases, like the girl who got acid spilled on her (I don’t know her name), Aberash, who lost both her eyes and a harari woman, who was murdered by her husband.
You can get details of Aberash’s case from our fellow Ethiopian blogger, AfricanFeminism.
The harari lady, from what I heard, was married to a divorced man with children. After a couple of years of marriage, she got a visa to go to the United States and when she told him, I guess he killed her. Maybe he was pissed that she never told him about the visa; maybe he didn’t want her to go; or maybe he had whatever reason.
I get it. The men who do these disgusting crimes are wrong. No woman deserves to be treated like this; actually, no human being should be treated like this. I mean, what is honestly going through a man’s mind as he murders the woman who he once claimed that he loved? Forget murdering; even just beating? Honestly, I can’t hurt a person if my life depended on it. (That might be an exaggeration, if my life depended on it, well…) Seriously though, you know when you’re just joking with your friends and they say, “come on, hit me the best you can.” They hit me the best that they can, but I don’t. Don’t ask me why.
Anyway, honestly, I don’t know exactly if we can always blame the men alone. (I AM IN NO WAY SAYING THE ABOVE MENTIONED PEOPLE ARE WRONG. I JUST WANT TO POINT OUT AN OBSERVATION).
So one day, my parents and I were driving up to our home and you know how the Ethiopian homes are, the houses are not right on the street. You have to go in narrow roadways where only one car can go through at a time. Anyway, we drove up to our gate and there was a couple standing like 10 feet away. (Our narrow roadway is commonly known as Romeo and Juliet Road as there are at least 3-4 couples standing in the corners of people’s gates after dark. But this wasn’t at night yet; it was like 5pm-ish. So I look over and I see the dude hitting the girl and I’m like, “huh?” I tell my mom to look over and she saw the same thing. Mom rolled down the window and yelled out to the guy to stop hitting her, and he just ignored her. After she repeated a couple of times, the GIRL turns around and she says, “No, it’s OK; leave him alone.” At this point, I’m in shock. For a second I thought the girl was kidding but you can tell from her voice and the look of her eyes that she wasn’t fine. When help is offered and the women refuse, what do we do? What SHOULD we do?
This isn’t the first time I heard about this kinds of stories. This happens all the time and everywhere. Even the little “joking” punches on our arms turn into a slap, and finally it’s out of control. Some women are ALLOWING the men to treat them like this. How do we educate the women that this is not OK? I know that that girl was afraid of what would happen once we’re gone, but when help comes, I think you should take it.
When will these kinds of horrendous acts will stop?
When will it be the “breaking point”?
When will the good men join us in finally putting an end to this?
When will this be taken VERY SERIOUSLY?
When acid is thrown in a woman’s face?
When a woman loses her sight?
When a woman is murdered?